Good morning everyone, welcome to the Pot Cakes Dynasty League Week 5 Preview. This is the week. This is the juicy piece. This is the one that you find out who is the manager teased yesterday. We look at our Game of the Week, matchups, Dr. Tilt, Power Rankings, and an all-exclusive deep dive into the events that took place regarding trade talks. Buckle up, it’s about to get bumpy.
Game of the week.
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Daddy Wombat v. Trashman
This might be the closest matchup for D.W. all year, they deserve to be in the spotlight for this one. D.W. enters as a 2 point dog. D.W. has Jalen Hurts looking for a bounce back week and current QB5. James Rob is trying to stay a RB1 and should be traded from D.W. D.W. get the value while you can. Dameon Pierce is looking to cement his role as an every down guy for the Texans. D.K. is looking to empty the tank in a tough matchup against the Saints (he pooped during the game last week, empty the tank like his body). Jerry Jeudy and Tyler Higbee are the only other worthy mentions for D.W. Chase Clayp00l is down bad and should not be mentioned, so I won’t. Trashman is fresh off a loss. This is a must win. T-Law looked bad last week and cannot handle the rain. Aaron Jones, Nick Chubb, Cam Akers, and Rashaad Penny round out his ground game. Mark Andrews and Curty Sam are his best receiving options. It should be a tight one. I think D.W. puts their heads together and pulls this one out.
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Bottom Bunk v. Batman
Another tight one, but guaranteed to be low scoring. Waiver wire QB for B.B., Jamaal Williams, Breece Hall, Christian Kirk, and Drake London for B.B. Batman has Lamar, DeVonta Smith, Olave, and A.J. Dillon. We have about as many words in this preview as expected points between these two teams. Give me B.B. just because he is not starting multiple tight ends. With a QB and if Swift is healthy, I think Batman ends up being a 3 point favorite, but I’m still going B.B.
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Pistol v. Teach
Pistol is known for upsets, mainly because he’s always the underdog. Teach does not let dogs in the classroom. This could be a pounding (dogs, pounds, am I even good at this?). Pistol has Kyler fresh off a dub. Hines is looking for some points with the JT ankle injury. Michael Carter and Herbert may bot share a split backfield this week. Sutton, Lazard, A.J. Brown, Garrett Wilson, and Kyle Pitts. Pistol has a chance. Teach is rocking Rodgers, Mixon, Stevenson, Doubs, Higgins, Tony Pollard, and the ever so hot T.J. Hockenson. Let us not forget the dynamic duo of Tyreek Hill and Jaylen Waddle, can Teddy2Tuds a piece this week? Give me Teach by a meter stick.
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Touchdown Guy v. Mush’s Mongrels
The lead dog looking to lead the dogs. TDG has Tall Josh Allen, D-Train, Jacobs, Mike Evans, Cooper Kupp, and George Kittle. All of these guys had big weeks except George Kittle. Kittle has to get it done for TDG, at least once the offs come around. Mush said his guys are available, but there’s not a lot there. Clyde, J.K. Mel, Mike Will, Hollywood, Diontae, and Deebo. We have a revenge game going on between Gibby and Mel. That should be fun to watch. TDG guaranteed production from Gibby is going down as Brian Robinson Jr. (on his IR) is designated to return, while things for Mel are looking up unless he keeps putting the ball down. TDG is a 27 point favorite. TDG takes the cake.
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CrossFit v. Bruce
CrossFit is looking to make a little run here. CrossFit has CMC, Ekeler, and Saquon all coming off big weeks. Mix in Amari Cooper, Tyler Lockett, Devin Duvernay, and Travis Kelce and we got a solid squad. Bruce has two players that are considered a 1 at their position, those players are Joe Burrow at QB7 and Jared Goff at QB4. Too bad this is not a superflex or TE premium league. CrossFit is a 13 point favorite and I think he gets it done.
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PeePaw v. JonnyDIII’s Joyful Demons
This should be a great matchup and arguably should be the game of the week. Herbert v. Mahomes, Cook v. Sanders, Monty v. Hunt, J.J. v. Diggs, Lamb v. Chase, Adams v. Allen, Wilson and Aiyuk v. Pittman and Cooks. We have a pretty even matchup. Some of the heavier favorites tilt PeePaw’s way but the consistency across the board favors JD3. We will see if PeePaw gets the big plays and if JD3 can get his projections across the board. PeePaw is a 3 point favorite, and 2 of those points are from the kicker. This one is too close to call.
Dr. Tilt Week 5 Picks.
Again ***Please check your local, county, state, country, gaming, and other laws to see if gambling is allowed and available near you.
Dr. Tilt’s Week 5 Prescription
Dr. Tilt Week 5 was 1-2 Season: 5-7
New York Giants @ Green Bay Packers (-7.5)
Across the pond we go! The Green Bay Packers probably shouldn’t be favored by 8 points against anyone right now, let alone on a neutral site on a different continent. However, the Giants have zero fully healthy quarterbacks. All signs point to Daniel Jones playing but with all the travel and a bad hoof his best asset, running, is taken away. Packers will let this bloke throw the football which is a bad recipe, like an English Breakfast. Giants will struggle to score and we can debate if this classifies as a primetime game, but Aaron Rodgers bloody covers when his team is the only one on TV.
Atlanta Falcons (+9) @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Cole Beasley retired and cited that he wants to be a full-time dad and husband. One week after being around Tom Brady, and everything he has going on? Yikes. Atlanta Keeps it close.
Seattle Seahawks (+5.5) @ New Orleans Saints
Know what’s Dangeruss? Saying the Seahawks offense looks a whole lot better than the Broncos. What’s also Dangeruss? Taking a public underdog. Be careful, it’s SPICCYYYYYY. Saints travel back from London off a double-doink loss and may struggle to get going. Seahawks keep it close. (Please sponsor Dr. Tilt and this blog Subway, k thanks.)
Last Week: 1-2
Season: 5-7
And now for an all new power rankings.
Teach remains at the top, TDG remains second, Batman’s 9 bench points give him the slight edge at the bottom. PeePaw is slowly coming back, B.B. is slowly going back, down.
If you made it this far or just skipped to the end we have the biggest controversy in PCDL history. A team went from worst to second first and is now worst (in their division). Said manager claims “my rbs available” post to trading block the requirements to meet said trade. Three teams approach said manager. First manager is out despite having what looks like a top 4 pick. Ok, no big deal, still two heavy hitters with assets left. Both teams make an offer, one was Team A offered a First, a starting WR, and a starting RB for his team, the other 2 Firsts and a bench WR for his team, Team B. The trading block had a top dynasty RB, Jonathan Taylor, for 3 firsts or 2 firsts and a WR. Team A was informed that Team B sent 2 Firsts and a WR and that the trading team needed 2 Firsts rather than the 2 players offered. Team A met with his team to address the trade rumors, shared a moment and sent the trade that the Trading Team wanted. Trading Team did not want two players, Trading Team wanted 2 firsts and a WR. Team B ends up sending 2 Firsts and a pinch start/fringe start based on situation. Team A, having already sent the trade asked for receives a text from the Trading Team “Not close on calculator” then “Your picks are gona (spell much) be late 1st and I don’t even want [said fringe start RB]”. Team A asks who is [said fringe RB], knowing that the Trading Team was trying to leverage his offer behind his back, Team A took rescinded the offer. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush they say. Surely after realizing this asinine move, you would think the Trading Team would provide a little explanation. The follow up was “I’m basically hanging you (this may be a threat so I am not changing the spelling) the top dynasty RB for two late round 1st”. I did not look too far into it but everything I know, and every player I know involved in the trade, the player from Team A is a WR2 in any Dynasty Chart. So to say that the trade was for basically 2 firsts is insulting. Trading Team then goes on to call WR2 on all dynasty charts a scrub. The trading team having 3 other WR 2s on his team, it makes you question his definition of a scrub. Then the trading team goes on to say all the trade offers sucked. The Trading Team lied before the first dynasty draft about the player he was taking, the Trading Team drafted an Undrafted Rookie WR in the second round of this year’s rookie draft, and now the Trading Team is asking for an exact trade and then saying it is not enough. This is an all-time bad move for any manager to burn bridges, let alone burn a bride with arguably the deepest team in the league. For privacy purposes I will only share the names of two managers. The Trading Team Manager was Bruce. Team A was JonnyDIII. Bruce Flores asked for the exact trade from JD3 that JD3 sent to Bruce Flores. Then Bruce Flores tried upping his trade offer from a team that wasn’t already trying to spend up. Bruce Flores has been back pedaling ever since. Bruce Flores would not share the website he was using for his trade calculator. Bruce Flores claimed the trade was trash. Bruce Flores eventually disclosed the trade calculator, fair trade. Accuses JD3 of tanking in a year where if JD3 was tanking he could not tank hard enough because Bruce Flores finished dead last in a year he was trying to win. Bruce Flores went on to call JD3’s player trash. Bruce went on to say no one made his trade demands. JD3 offered 2 firsts and a starting WR on everyone’s roster. Bruce Flores claimed said player would not start for him. Bruce Flores is in 11th place. Bruce Flores has two starting WRs worse than JD3’s WR in his starting lineup and another guy that will be replaced once the team’s rookie WR is healthy. JD3 never even received a counter offer in the app from Bruce Flores. I know what you are all probably thinking by now, Flores wasn’t the one to send the text, well Bruce is along way from being B.B. and Flores was run out of the league, just like Bruce is about to be with bonehead moves like this. Bruce has 5 tight ends on his roster, but cannot find room for a Dynasty WR2. Bruce has been rumored to be on the no-trade list of multiple managers in the league. These managers share their belief that they would rather have honesty and unreasonableness like that of Pistol rather than unreasonableness and dishonesty from Bruce. If a man cannot keep his word than what kind of man is he. I was able to catch up with JD3, after a few hour conversation I think this quote sums it up. “The ability to lie, paired with unaccountability, has made a near infinite amount of liabilities, and Bruce’s team, in the short and the long, has a lot of liabilities.” Powerful stuff. We will see how it pans out for each team going forward. For Bruce and his RB value, Saquon the current RB1, through 4 weeks has the lowest RB1 total through 4 weeks since 1997. Looks like RBs are going down faster than Bruce’s playoff hopes.
Well, that was an exciting story to start off Week 5. Hopefully you have better people in your league and until next time I hope you and yours have a better tomorrow.
Let’s Go!
JonnyDIII
DIII Digest 